Just venting. I do that occasionally...I've had a bad day. Nothing really bad happened to me when I think about it. But it's just been a rough couple of weeks and it doesn't seem to be getting any easier. I thought that once this medical junk was over with, I'd be alright, alas, that doesn't seem to be the case. Right now I'm going through crazy emotional highs and lows at the moment. A friend of mine suggested it was because I was starting to eat right. A friend of hers went on a no-carb diet for like a year before her wedding and then started eating normally again and it was like she was a different person. I don't think I'm to the point where I'm not me, but my temper definitely sparks lately. If I don't get food every few hours, I'm the meanest person I've ever met. I can feel my fuse getting shorter. And I'm a nice girl. I'm not mean. I'm selfish, but not mean-spirited. And I get frustrated. Frustrated about the little things in my life. Like things aren't where they should be and I can't do anything about it but sit and wait. And then I wonder if waiting is what God had in mind for me all along. Do I move on? Close the door and chalk it up to my youth and lack of experience? And then I have a moment of clarity to where I think I'm right where I need to be and doing what I'm supposed to be doing. Does God ever do a big neon flashing sign? Cuz I could use one at the moment. Not one telling me where to go, just one that says He's involved in this right alongside me.
(And clearly I need to add whiny to the list as well...)
(And clearly I need to add whiny to the list as well...)
3 comments:
This morning I was doing my 30 days homework. The reading was Eph. 3:14-21. Here is a part of some of the text that came with today's lesson. Which just happened to be what I needed to hear in response to yesterday's rant...
"The purity we long for...a life filled with the "fullness of God"...a life that is changed on the inside and outside...all the things that are "immeasurably more than we can ask or imagine"...the life you've always wanted is possible. God is ready to unleash His power into your life."
I can't wait!
This is something that never ceases to put a smile on my face. He has everything planned out so perfectly. He knew yesterday would be a bad day and knew exactly what you would need to hear (or read) to restore you. He's just too awesome.
I'm excited for you
I miss you....I read your blog and could totally hear your voice saying it, that made me miss you more...i love ya, miss ya, be good, email me later, oh yeah, eat more... :)
Paul
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